Tema

dragons-princess:

allonsyforever:

mugglebornheadcanon:

501. Muggleborns accidentally calling Dumbledore “Gandalf”.

"accidentally"

And Dumbledore plays along with it and dresses as Gandalf for Halloween every now and then.

suziedowninthequiet:

ah, the heroism of rpg characters

"i’m off to save the townspeople from being murdered by the king’s men! and on my way, i’ll go into all their empty houses and steal the money i find!"

heyfunniest:

Someone took a candid photo of a fight in Ukranian Parliament that is as well-composed as the best renaissance art.

heyfunniest:

Someone took a candid photo of a fight in Ukranian Parliament that is as well-composed as the best renaissance art.

i-effed-it-all-up:

if you’re ever feeling sad just remember that tatiana maslany roller bladed to her orphan black audition

bombing:

just saw a post accusing Obama of working for the government

wificrossing:

i wish animal crossing was real like u walk into a new town dirt poor and suddenly u have a career and people who like u

wheresmywarhorse:

rlyhigh:

I’m so done

The *duh duh duhs* were so on point I can’t

wheresmywarhorse:

rlyhigh:

I’m so done

The *duh duh duhs* were so on point I can’t

feministbatwoman:

gishkishenh:

hojasenblanco:

Dangerous wolf

Big Bad Wolf, indeed.

"WHOSAN APEX PREDATOR? IS IT YOU? IS IT YOU? IT IS YOU!"

feministbatwoman:

gishkishenh:

hojasenblanco:

Dangerous wolf

Big Bad Wolf, indeed.

"WHOSAN APEX PREDATOR? IS IT YOU? IS IT YOU? IT IS YOU!"

woodmeat:

chevy-raised-jack-daniels-fed:

merrymaudlin:

mercurykiss:

thugburrito:

My faith in pizza guys has gone up 123%

NO LET ME TELL YOU A STORYSo a few weeks ago I was in a hotel in Savannah with my grampa in the hospital next door, Mom was over staying with him, and the battery in the smoke detector went out so every 5 minutes it would let off this loud, high pitched ‘CHIRP’.It was annoying as fuck, so I called the front desk to see if they had a battery for it, and they said the only thing they could do was change rooms. We’d already settled in for the night, and needed the next door rooms for my uncles the next day, so I said I’d deal. My uncles had my car in the next town over, so I couldn’t drive and get one myself.An hour later, I’m ordering pizza and have gone insane because the damn thing CHIRPS. SO. MUCH.So I begged the pizza guy on the phone to stop and get me a battery, told him I’d pay for the battery, and give him an extra tip for it, and he was chill with it. This adorable fucker gets to my room with the battery, opens it, asks to see the smoke detector, CLIMBS ON THE BED, CHANGES THE BATTERY FOR ME, and tests it.My pizza was only 20 dollars, but I gave him 40 and told him to keep the change.

I am clearly not fully utilizing my pizza delivery person…..

What’s next pizza delivery hitmen

included in this order for a large ground beef is a dossier containing information on your target. he is to be neutralized before delivery. do not let him reach the airport. no pepperoni.

woodmeat:

chevy-raised-jack-daniels-fed:

merrymaudlin:

mercurykiss:

thugburrito:

My faith in pizza guys has gone up 123%

NO LET ME TELL YOU A STORY
So a few weeks ago I was in a hotel in Savannah with my grampa in the hospital next door, Mom was over staying with him, and the battery in the smoke detector went out so every 5 minutes it would let off this loud, high pitched ‘CHIRP’.

It was annoying as fuck, so I called the front desk to see if they had a battery for it, and they said the only thing they could do was change rooms. We’d already settled in for the night, and needed the next door rooms for my uncles the next day, so I said I’d deal. My uncles had my car in the next town over, so I couldn’t drive and get one myself.

An hour later, I’m ordering pizza and have gone insane because the damn thing CHIRPS. SO. MUCH.

So I begged the pizza guy on the phone to stop and get me a battery, told him I’d pay for the battery, and give him an extra tip for it, and he was chill with it. This adorable fucker gets to my room with the battery, opens it, asks to see the smoke detector, CLIMBS ON THE BED, CHANGES THE BATTERY FOR ME, and tests it.

My pizza was only 20 dollars, but I gave him 40 and told him to keep the change.

I am clearly not fully utilizing my pizza delivery person…..

What’s next pizza delivery hitmen

included in this order for a large ground beef is a dossier containing information on your target. he is to be neutralized before delivery. do not let him reach the airport. no pepperoni.

“The police can go to downtown Harlem and pick up a kid with a joint in the streets. But they can’t go into the elegant apartments and get a stockbroker who’s sniffing cocaine.”

— Noam Chomsky (via nunatuthash)

outofcontextdnd:

Lawful Good Dracomancer: I rolled a 19 on Thievery to unlock the chains?

DM: Yeah you free Orion from his chains.

LG Dracomancer: Oh. Cool. I’ve… never done that before.

Barbarian: Welcome to the world of Neutral Good.

LG Dracomancer: *whimpers*